2020

The START/DISASTER! The MOVE!

The START

When you reach the new year all everyone ever says "NEW YEAR NEW ME" well for our family we finally made a BIG move to the mainland. So "NEW YEAR NEW BEGINNINGS' Not till the ending of March 2020.

The DISASTER

We did plan this for a while but a lot of obstacles were in our way. For example, my dad trying to have every things to say for convince us to stay or this whole COVID-19 that started to happen in January. Then we've had so many tragic events that happen in Hawaii. Plus to live there is too expensive. All we wanted to do was  to live comfortably. We also tried TWICE living on our own but plans wasn't going smoothly. So now our foolish decisions messed up a lot of things that we could've had while we are making this move to the mainland.

The MOVE

The day came. The emotions going all over my whole body. The sadness. It was really the next step for us. Like it was really happening. In my mind I was thinking twice but I knew in my heart this is going to be the best decision for my little family. Financial wise. We are here in San Diego at the moment but soon we will be taking a road trip all the way to Virginia. I am scared to be honest for what's going to happen when we get there but I trust my husband with everything that he says he's going to do. For me to help him is with our financial situation that we both got to fix. Since we been here I've already initiated on doing that finally fixing our credit. It sucks but it something that'll help not only us but for our kids future also.

As 2018 comes to an end...

December 27th, 2018

    It's been long since I've blogged lately. Hmmm..what's been going on with my life now? you say. 

My ohana has grown so much as you can see

I started a Youtube Channel

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC3Ocp8GxOoQf4fBmkzgUArw?view_as=subscriber

My youngest made ONE YEARS OLD

My oldest baby is still a hard headed boy but SMART as the days goes by

Yes we cut his curly hair (REALLY REGRET doing that)

As for me and my husband...well let's just say we both are still in LOVE and very HAPPY. Many times we've butt heads with each other but what married couples doesn't fight and argue.

We made TWO YEARS as a married couple & THREE YEARS together on December 18th

I honestly can say even though I had a messed up past I knew GOD had plans for me someday and those days are since I've first had my son and met my wonderful husband. As of what I'm doing now? Still the same thing I'm a stay home mom. Taking care of my two babies and also maintaining our own place. Trying to pay the bills first then getting everything that we don't have in our place. After that's all paid, we do FAMILY time. Go out to eat or go to an arcade or just get my boys something like toys. Everything that me and my husband do is all for our babies. 

Being a stay home mom can be boring but raising my kids how I want them to be raised is the best thing I can do. In my free time when the boys are taking their naps I either vlog for my Youtube channel or I just watch youtube videos or play video games. I started back listening to kpop and let me tell you I've missed alot. I am officially a BTS ARMY. The most epic beautiful korean group I have ever heard and their songs have so much meanings in all of them. Other than that guys that's all the updates about us.

OH ACTUALLY........

THERE IS ONE MORE THING......

I'M PREGNANT AGAIN

another baby boy😍

Stay home mom

This goes out to any stay home mothers out there.

For me this is the first time in my life I didn't have to go to work and miss so many stuffs that my child is doing or saying. People thinks that being a stay at home mother is not really a job. Well they really don't know how it goes down. Every day I wake up real early in the morning to my child's cries because he wants to sleep with me and his father. So I wake up, change his wet diaper and make his bottle till he falls back to sleep and that takes a while. Then my husband goes to work and I take a nap till my child wakes up again maybe about like 7 in the morning. Wake up, start making his breakfast which is his oatmeal rice cereal and a warm bottle of milk.
Once he's finish eating it's time for put on his baby learning videos and play with his toys. Once he's distracted from playing I go into our room and start cleaning. Then head to the kitchen, wash dishes and wipe the counters. Sometimes I would start cleaning my refrigerator or my oven. Start sweeping and mopping my room and the kitchen. Then after my child's stomach rest from eating his breakfast, I go and make his baby bath and clean him up. Dry him up, put his diaper on, and start putting on his clothes.
If he gets fussy I start putting on songs like Bruno Mars, cause he loves his songs. Make another bottle for him. By the time I finish that. He slowly falls asleep in his play pen. Once he's asleep, I go take out the trash, start picking up his toys, turn off all the unnecessary electricity off, clean up the living room, take the dog out and feed the dog.
By the time everything's done, he gets up from his afternoon nap. Then my husband comes home from work around 3, I make a little snack for him cause I know my husband get's really hungry when he gets home. So he starts playing his games. You know to relax and take a little nap well that's what he says usually his little naps is like 2-3 hours.
My child still plays with his toys. I start cooking dinner around 6. Then wake up my husband for him to eat and make my child his food. Start feeding him first before I eat. Then put my child to sleep so I can eat, cause kids specially mines would want all your guys attention in the world. My child cannot let me use the bathroom for a second cause he'll start crying. So my child sleeps then I start to eat.
 Once I'm done eating, me and my husband watches a movie but then every time I want to watch a movie with him, he ends up falling asleep. Hasn't been an hour in the movie and he starts falling asleep on me. But what can I expect from him, he's tired from work and works hard for us to have a roof over our heads and food on our table. So I really do appreciate my husband for all his hard work every day. 

At times I really do want to go back to work for help my husband with bills but my husband doesn't want me to and well also it's too late for me cause I am 26 weeks pregnant with my second child and nobody will hire me around this time.

If  people says being a stay home mom is not a job, it totally is. Doing all of this 24/7 not just 40 hours a week like everybody that works a real job it is mostly every day of your life till your child grows up and starts going to school.

Thank you for reading my blog

Patience for love

Did you ever wonder in every relationships, you thought he/she was the one but at the end of those years, months, or days that he/she wasn't what you expected or he/she lied about everything about themselves and what they wanted?

I've been there and done that. I know about bad relationships and bad people. Everything in my life I had bad luck. Don't everyone? I was this close about to give up on love...until in the month of June. I met an amazing person well my cousin set us up. We ended up being best friends and we both had a crappy past. We also can be goofy with each other and not judge each other also. Bonus is that not also he loves me but he loves my son and treats my son like his own. Now we are engaged and having another baby boy in APRIL 2017.

So in my words even though you had a bad life in the past, God ALWAYS has a plan for you in  the future. A very beautiful loving future until it's that time.

Baby Daddy

ISSUES

All of a sudden my son's father CARES about him. Took him this long to actually CARE about my son. Last week, he tried to message me saying, "Come on we need to talk." I ignored all his messages. Then it was just getting too annoying. So I replied back. The whole conversation we had was about my son, but at a certain time he messages me like night time when CJ is asleep. Like an idiot he thinks he'll be wide awake. Why only know HE cares about my son? When he said he'll try to forget about us. Then I knew something was up, he told me if I still was going to file child support. I told him I don't have him on the birth certificate because he never supported our son. He wanted to go and fool around with other girls. So why would I want to put him on when he didn't even come to his birth and constantly I reminded him my son's due date. Anyway he wanted to know if I was because he wanted to "Join the army." BS cause he told me that when I was 4 months pregnant with CJ and now he's thinking about joining. All this free time he had and he wants to do it now. 

Oh! Here's the BIG part the last time he message me he asked if me and CJ were going to be in Oahu. I replied, "Yeah, Maybe." but then I asked him,"WHY?" He asked if he could see my son in JUNE and honestly I told him I don't think so after what he put me through, not one helped me through my struggles and my family dislikes him especially my father. Also I told him I don't trust him. All the lies he told me when we were together. 

More he got upset cause I said NO. He actually has no say so I blocked him off of Facebook and everything else. I don't even want to see him no more and my son don't need him either. 

Being a single mother I can be both mommy and daddy. WE don't need him or his help cause I've been doing it ever since he was born and only know the "father" decides to help when my dad was the one helping me financially and physically. So he can go enjoy his little vacation in Oahu but leave me and my son out of it. TRUST people I am not a bad person because of what I choose. And don't think I should give him a chance cause he had ALOT of chances with my son's life and he made the choice of screwing it up and he knows it. I don't want a DEAD BEAT DADDY in his life and mines. I dislike dealing with him cause its going nowhere with him. So that's my decision. 

CJ know matter what I am only doing this for you, HE was NEVER there. MOMMY was always there giving you all the love you needed and where was HE, in his own little world being a young kid that wants to fool around and only certain time that he'll call you. While you here with me, I have time to always be by your side my son. I LOVE YOU ALWAYS CJ.

First Easter

Me and my cousins were at Pearlridge and mind you my son was sleeping the whole time we were walking around just killing time. So I wanted my son to take his first Easter pictures since I was in Oahu, Hawaii. When we were standing in line, my son decides to get up but when the employees were taking his pictures all his pose was a BIG grouchy face. Was really funny. It was good thing the employees says we could come back to take another shoot for us. Couple hours later, my son was finally wide awake. Went back to the pictures. And so glad we did. This is how his picture with the Easter bunny came out and I totally LOVE it.

 He also had a funny picture with the Easter bunny.

LOL! My son has so many characters in him. Can't wait to see more.

Unknown Bruises?

This morning I woke up real early due to my son moving around so I knew he was going to get up pretty soon. Got his bottle, then burped him. Went to the bathroom to go and brush my teeth when I noticed on my left knee and left elbow, I saw these strange bruises. Don't even know how I got them.

One time when I had these mysterious bruises I asked my grandma if she knows how I got them, she said they might be ghost bruises. Ghost that makes a mark on you or something. I forgot the whole story about it when she told me about it, but all I know they are called "Ghost bruises" bruises that just came out of nowhere, you don't know when or how you got them. When she told me that, I kind of got scared because I do believe in ghost or any superstition or folk stories that my elders tells me. It really creeps me out.

Couple weeks later I and my son stayed in Oahu, HI to take a little vacay away from Maui. The first night my bruises were gone. Now I am back at home in Maui and let's see if the bruises come back.